I'm missing them. I'm missing everything lately. I remember the way we were, back in 2012. The conversations, our hopes, hugs and dreams. How college was just something funny, to pass time. I remember everything. The girl I used to be: smiling, friendly, clingy. I didn't know two years later I would have lost myself. That I would lost mostly everything I had. I doubt so much now, I don't even know who I want to be anymore. I don't even want to be anymore. I'm alone. We all took different paths, and now when we meet, we just barely talk to each others. "How are you?". "Fine." We were "best friends", you should know I'm not fine at all. But that's life isn't it? That's what adults call "growing up". Guess what? I hate this. Growing up. Facing responsabilities. Troubles. Finding a job. People leaving. Knowing that the world isn't a kind of beautiful place, where everybody is happy. No one is happy here. People are just faking it. Truth is, we are all broken souls. Some of us are trying their best to improve their condition and their lives, find something to make them happy, and inevitatbly, they will find a way. And you have some, like me, who rather like staying home in PJs and write, watching movies, reflect on things that happened and cry, and do everything to avoid the fact of going outside. The outside world became something scary, because we have to face people we don't trust anymore and pretend we're happy. And we're not. We don't want to be here. We don't want to go either. We're just waiting. Living. Dying. Not much difference for us. People will try to fix us, but they couldn't. They will never find a way. Why? Because our hearts have been so much damaged, there is no way they can be fixed.